So to start off I want to highlight that I think this is just an awkward phase most artists go through. What I’m talking about is calling yourself the big “A-word” aka artist. I’ve only recently began to call myself an artist. Maybe it’s because it wasn’t until recently that I feel I started to develop my own body of work.
I’ve noticed how awkward I still feel about it. Especially when I’m at my part-time job. My coworkers think I’m amazing. That I’m going to quote on quote “make it”. But here I am and all I think to myself is I’m not actually that talented. I love making art and that’s why I decided to make it my career. But at the same time I don’t think this is because of raw talent.
I grew up loving to draw. Yet, I never actually committed myself to making art literally until my first year as an art student. Everything I know and everything I have become has solely been thanks to my hard work and determination. I chose to make something that I had a mild interest in into my whole life. I think this might be why I feel awkward calling myself an artist. Sure I make art. But art hasn’t been the absolute center of my universe. It was something I decided I wanted to pursue and I’ve slowly worked up and made myself in to an “artist”.
Maybe calling myself an “artist” just doesn’t feel real. When I think of an “artist” I think of someone famous or well-known. Not a girl who decided last minute to apply to colleges and decided an art major sounded the most interesting to her. Hahaha but on the other hand that might be exactly what makes me an “artist”. I love painting, struggling with my work and constantly growing from one work to another.
Ahhhhh point is yay I’m an artist now. So I’ll keep on pushing and maybe someday soon I’ll stop feeling like calling myself an “artist” is weird. For now I just have a regular case of imposter syndrome.